We all know the feeling, watching the clock tick down from 59 seconds, your heartbeat unable to find any kind of calm rhythm, beads of sweat creeping their way down your forehead as your index finger hovers over that big red button that could either save the world… or destroy it.
Or not to bid?
Who cares if your budget was £50 (absolute max of £55), when you’re 25 seconds from the finish line and fancygirl84 slinks in with her £59.89 there’s only one thing that matters anymore – she is going down.
Once competition comes into it, how much you actually want that wingback doesn’t even come into it. Winning is the only thing that matters now.
Should you bid again? Is that enough time for her to get in there again before you can? How many people are watching this? At 8 seconds the highest bid has gone up again and you know there’s not enough time, you’ll never get your bid in now. It’s gone.
There’s always the one that got away, the perfect Parker Knoll wingback that was an absolute steal and would have changed your home completely. Sitting there in your imitation mid-century style EKENÄSET you bought to replace the POÄNG that’s been a stalwart workhorse since someone left it behind in your final year of University, you curse the day you didn’t bid an extra £10 for the Parker Knoll.
The one that slipped through the cracks.
The reason you avoid looking at eBay at all now because the sting of bitter disappointment is just too much.
Missing out on something you’ve set your heart on, even if you don’t actually need-need it, can push down on your chest and stop you from looking for anything else.
If you’re planning your wedding this will be pretty familiar to you too –
“Will I ever find what I’m looking for…”
“I swear there must be someone…anyone who understands transparent Chiavari chairs are so ugly they make me want to push this USB stick into my eyeball…”
“Hold the phone, this exactly what I need…”
“I have to have it!”
Once your dream wedding supplier has carefully wormed its way into your brain, or *sharp intake of breath* your Pinterest board, or *slaps hand to mouth a little too hard* your budget spreadsheet… that’s it.
Game Over. It’s too late to talk yourself off that ledge now.
But when you factor in the two tiny enormous details of the £60 million lottery you forgot to win and the 300,000 other weddings happening in the UK this year (I KNOW, 300,000. That is one insane number!), the pressure to make a decision quickly and push that big red button is pretty damn intense.
I don’t want to make you panic, but no matter how far ahead you’re planning there’s always someone else that can (and will) book that band before you.
Fear of missing out is a potent thing and suddenly the half a day it takes for someone to respond feels like the time you watched the first Hobbit movie. Everyone knows Bilbo is going to find the ring and set the scene for the Lord of the Rings, but 8 hours really is a long time to wait for a conclusion.
So when you find yourself in a ‘play it safe’/’bite the bullet’/‘buy it now’ situation, remember what the most important thing about weddings (and life for that matter) is:
In the end, when the big day you never thought would arrive busts through the bathroom stall door, slaps you in the face and tells you to “pull your pants up, it’s show-time!” all those little massive decisions you’ve made along the way will pull together for a day every person there will enjoy.
The wedding industry is a big place (especially in London). If there’s something you know you 100% can’t live without, stop procrastinating and book it. But if you miss out on that perfect photographer, that venue doesn’t have the date you need or that clean and crisp stationery is just way out of your price range, it’s not the end of all things.
There are lots of other options out there, some of the best ones are up and coming, hidden gems; you just need to find them.